When I’m knowingly being lazy, I tend to only think about how my laziness will affect me. I put things off knowing that it will put me behind, but in the long run I’ll be able to handle it, I’ll be able to complete everything and it will get done eventually. What I don’t always realize is how me putting my work off and not finishing it in a timely manner, or within a time that I committed to getting it done in, affects others as well.
God is affected by my laziness the most, and my relationship with Him suffers as a result. Often times I don’t realize this until I’m in a place where I’ve grown my relationship with God a lot, and it makes me think about how I could’ve been doing so much more in past situations. There’s never a more humbling reminder than realizing you’ve wasted precious time not in God’s light, and it’s a reminder I’ll never stop needing. Sometimes I’m not focusing on God for other reasons, but being lazy is probably my least favorite excuse from myself because it means that I was the sole reason for not connecting with God.
It’s easier to not pray and think about all the hardships and the suffering I’m going through or that others have asked me to pray for. It’s easier to not let God have my doubts and fears because then I get to feel like I have control. It’s easier to not have quiet time during a busy day because then I feel like I’m being more productive in regards to all of my work. It’s easier to be lazy about spiritual life because then my heart never feels convicted and I don’t have to move outside my comfort zone for anything. It’s hard to admit these things because they’re things I want to come easily, but acting against this world as Christ followers must do is not a natural talent, it’s something I must continually practice.
I think sometimes it feels like there’s a lot of pressure to always be energized as a Christian. When I come back from something spiritually moving, it brings new purpose to my life, but the monotony of life tends to counteract that. I think when I try to remove this pressure of being a Christian All-Star at all times, I see that it doesn’t take as much energy to be close to God as I feel like it does.