I enjoy being busy. I enjoy having a lot to do and challenging myself to manage my time, but mostly I like to be involved with a lot of different things. I like getting to know people and being passionate about something and seeing a common goal carried out.
I believe God wants us to work hard. It gives us a chance to grow closer to Him in our times of weakness that will inevitably arise, it allows us to bring Him glory, and it helps us figure out more of His magnificent plan. I feel active in my faith when I have a lot to do because I’m making connections with people and making things happen.
The downside to this mentality is that it’s hard for me to relax. The sabbath was created for a reason. God knows our limitations and gives us a chance to rejuvenate here and there (once a week, ideally) in order to enable us to be our best for Him and with Him.
I often wonder why it can be so difficult for me to relax. I think part of it has to do with our society’s mentality to work until you die, to power through illnesses, that taking breaks is for the weak. God knows our limitations and knows that we will burnout if we don’t take a moment to pause. Even God took a day off when He was creating the world, so I think that justifies us taking a mental health day once in awhile.
This mentality of not being good enough because I’m not working until the point of exhaustion compromises my time with God because I think that what I’m doing is more important, because I’m not taking the time to listen to what He wants from me. The more days I focus solely on myself, the further I’m getting from Him. The more weeks I go without rejuvenating, the less glory I have to offer Him. My pride in my work sacrifices my ability to stop and listen, to stop and be grateful, to stop and just be in God’s presence.
I want to apologize to God for sacrificing my time to be in a restful state by claiming to be too busy, and I ask God to humble my heart so that I may eagerly seek Him in all I do.